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Incidents Thought and Reason

Do fashionable girls invite rape?

Do fashionable girls invite rape?

IHM has written extensively about this topic, and there really isn’t much more than I can add. However, here are my two cents.

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In what seemed to be a re-enactment of the origins of the Slut Walk, Andhra Pradesh top cop Dinesh Reddy recently made a statement that ‘women who wear fashionable clothes provoke men, leading to increase in rape cases’. He indicated that modern and fashionable women are more prone to rape, BECAUSE of their inappropriate dressing. While many people were outraged, many others have applauded him on his courage!!

I lived in India for most of my life, and I can tell you for a fact, that EVEN IF YOU ARE COVERED FROM HEAD-TO-TOE you are still very much at the risk of being sexually abused.

For starters, how easy or difficult do you think it is for a woman to travel in a crowded bus without being touched inappropriately by a fellow passenger?! A young child, a teenager, a mother of two kids – nobody is spared. As long as one is a woman, she is likely to be molested at some point in time. Do you know how many middle-class woman living in Mumbai carry a sharp safety pin while travelling on a crowded local train? I was advised this ‘technique’ when I lived in Mumbai for a couple of months.

The groping, pinching and other lecherous behaviour that happens all the time, on our Indian roads and public transport is beyond a civilised person’s imagination!! To blame that sort of lecherous behaviour on the clothes of the victim sounds ridiculous, doesn’t it?

A potential rapist sees his victim as an object and nothing else. There are no statistics to prove that a woman wearing a modern dress is more likely to get raped as compared to a woman who is conservatively dressed.

This article (see link) talks about molestation statistics in our Capital city, New Delhi. Atleast one woman is molested EVERY DAY.

Are we really so naive as to believe that all those women who were molested or raped were dressed ‘inappropriately’ or ‘fashionably’?!

How about our villages? Those poor women are not dressed ‘fashionably’, and yet they suffer the humiliation and trauma of rape.

For a country that claims to treat women as ‘goddesses’, statistics surprisingly indicate an increasing amount of crime against women!!

Also, do read this shocking extract from http://www.thp.org/reports/indiawom.htm

‘In recent years, there has been an alarming rise in atrocities against women in India. Every 26 minutes a woman is molested. Every 34 minutes a rape takes place. Every 42 minutes a sexual harassment incident occurs. Every 43 minutes a woman is kidnapped. And every 93 minutes a woman is burnt to death over dowry.

One-quarter of the reported rapes involve girls under the age of 16 but the vast majority are never reported. Although the penalty is severe, convictions are rare.’

Let’s get to the ROOT of the problem.

This interesting link describing the various causes of rape

Every single reason for rape (lust/show of power/etc.) has entirely to do with the mindset of the rapist, and NOT the outfit of the victim.

The problem is not that girls are getting influenced by the West and/or are wearing fashionable clothes, thereby ‘provoking’ men.

Rape happens IRRESPECTIVE of the victim’s outfit and NOT BECAUSE of it.

If we take a step backward and analyse the situation, we find that our society is plagued by a strong ‘rape culture’.

Wiki defines this rape culture as:

‘a culture in which rape and sexual violence against women are common and in which prevalent attitudesnorms, practices, and media condone, normalize, excuse, or tolerate sexual violence against women.  Examples of behaviors commonly associated with rape culture include victim blaming, sexual objectification and rape apologism

As a society, we still tend to BLAME THE VICTIM. We believe that the victim is responsible, either directly or indirectly.

That way, we not only transfer the burden of rape on the woman, but also seek to excuse the rapist for his barbaric behaviour.

Statistics have not been able to prove the link between the victim’s outfits and incidence of rape. Please read an extract from this link ‘Through a Rapist’s Eyes’. Though this is applicable to the US, the underlying issue is very relevant to India too:

‘There is no data to suggest that a potential victim is at greater risk because of how she is dressed. Remember, 70-80% of assailants are known to their victim, so tactics of stranger rapists aren’t needed.’

More statistics only support the above statements by revealing that around 2/3rds of rape are committed by known persons rather than strangers!

Therefore, the point is – Rape is PREMEDITATED. To claim that a girl wore fashionable clothes, thereby provoking and INVITING rape is baseless.

And for those who really believe that covering ones’ self from head-to-toe protects you from rape, please do read this bold article.  Rape happens even with women who are completely covered behind a veil.

To be fair, I do understand that wearing revealing clothes might attract more attention in a country that is sexually repressed! But does that justify rape? NO. Rape is crime and you cannot simply BLAME the victim by the flimsy excuse that ‘she was wearing fashionable clothes’!

I think this comment on Yahoo beautifully sums it up: ‘A rapist has a totally different mindset. It’s much more sinister, because he is actually serious about his plans. And to a real rapist, the outfit probably doesn’t matter much at all’

The need of the hour is not guidelines on Indian women’s Dress Code, but concentrated efforts to get out of this gross rape culture.

There is no such thing as a ‘right to rape’!! The quicker we realise it, the better for us to evolve into a truly civilised society!

Please, do share your thoughts on this.

Categories
Humour Incidents Movie Review Thought and Reason

Love, Lust and Tamizh Cinema

1990: Chennai’ – Old, dull city. Faded tin-like PTC buses plying across dusty roads, passengers hanging out from all doors and windows too, much like grapes spilling out of a basket! Dark-skinned auto-drivers harassing their ‘savaari’ (passenger) for extra money.

Marriage was ‘arranged’ by matching horoscopes and families. And Love signified something forbidden. Passion, lust and seduction – three words used interchangeable, but sadly, all meant something borne out of duty to one’s spouse, or for someone else’s!

Seduction took many forms. Some were naive and delightful, like this:

And marriage meant a mature (beautiful, nevertheless) relationship between two equally serious adults.

Now this song is really old, but still amazes me! http://shankari.wordpress.com/, for putting this on FB 🙂

And one cannot forget this ‘then trendy’ song… (if you can stop laughing at the sensational 🙄 dance moves, that is!)

1992: For a community of people used to Hero Bhagyaraj’s hilarious flirting techniques…

… Perceptions of Love and Lust changed… with the arrival of suave fellow-south-Indian Arvind Swamy!

Suddenly, marriage changed from being a life-threatening-sober-event to something more fun and sexy.

And this innocent young girl’s idea of fun being frolicking about under waterfalls….

took the nation by storm!

Subsequently, ofcourse, we know how Bombay re-defined war, religion and passion among other things.

And suddenly, love was not ‘taboo’ or ‘gross’ any longer!!

This song, from Kalaignan, was as sensational (despite the heroine’s hair-do) as it was melodious. (Thanks, Vimmu & Scorpia, for reminding me).

Over these years, we had a deluge of ‘young’ movies, starring fresh and happy faces. ‘College life’ changed from ‘girls wearing dhavani and oily pig-tails’ to what-was-then-hep outfits 🙂 and Life also meant Fun 🙂

2000: And finally, while one could celebrate Youth and its associated freedom and carelessness, one also realised that beautiful sensual side to love.

This song from Alaipayuthey in particular was both naughty, and sensual. It showed that ‘marriage’ need not mean an always-behave-serious-relationship-of-two-mature-adults. Marriage could also mean ‘friendship’, ‘fun’ and spontaneity :-)

2001 onwards: Now, strangely, my mind goes blank when asked about songs that tingle the romance buds over the last ten years.

What songs redefined love and lust over the last ten years? Do fill in!

And on that happy note, hope you have a very good weekend, filled with sunshine, laughter and romance 😉

EDITED TO ADD:

Current faavvvvvvvvvvouurriiiiiiiiiiitttttttteeeeeeeeee: