Categories
Humour Incidents Thought and Reason

Bits, Bobs and Sexy legs

Ok, if you are one of those few people who re-read the title just now, for your kind information, it is ‘bIts, bObs and sexy legs’. Perverts… 🙄

I miss blogging! I miss reading posts by my blog-buddies, I miss commenting, I miss replying to the very kind comments on my own blog! 24-hours a day is simply not enough! There is so much to do, so much to not do… and hardly any time to write. So here are a few bits and bobs….

1) Just read this yesterday: It takes all the running you can do, to keep in the same place. How very true. You simply have to run faster than ever before, just to remain in the same place. I thought this was by Kotler, however, Wiki told me otherwise. To read the source of this brilliant line, do click this link.

2) We were browsing the ‘Father’s Day‘ Cards at Tesco today, and the young security boy commented about how ‘people are marketing every single thing!‘ and how ‘there is a day for every thing and every one’. I agreed , nodding wisely, until he blurted, ‘There’s a fathers day, a mother’s day… at this rate, they will introduce a Child’s day!‘ I guess this boy hadn’t heard of ‘Children’s Day’ 😆 😆 😆

3) On sexy legs… (Ah…. finally!)

I actually went to the gym last month. Twice so far! And I actually enjoyed it. Now having sweated out for two hours (one hour each session), I instantly felt ‘fitter’ than ever before.

So, there is this pedestrian crossing that I have to cross every day, to drop the Brat off at school. There is a glass wall on the opposite side of the road.

Now, the Brat and I were standing on this side of the road, waiting for the traffic signal to change, so we could cross over to the other side. And voila!! In the glass wall, I saw the most amazing reflection of my legs. Looking lean and long in those dark blue denim jeans. I was amazed at the results of my two hours of gym-ing. I gazed at the reflection for a couple of seconds, sighing, wondering why I didn’t begin exercising earlier. And then – guess what happened next….

.

..

….

…..

……

…….

……..

………

……….

And then.. the pair of legs turned around and started to walk away!!! 🙄

Despite my average levels of sanity, I could not – for the life of me – figure out (pun unintended) how my sexy legs could do that … Until I realised those belonged to someone else. .. to a real girl who was actually standing behind the glass wall and whose upper half was hidden by a board that contained the tube map 😦

🙄 🙄 😆 😆

It was all I could do, to stop myself from clicking a picture. Saks would have done a great job, but hey, I am not her.

On that note, where the hell is she????? And that reminds me, where the hell is every one else? Where are Vimmu, Solilo, Indyeah? Where are Pixie, Swar, Mon and Uma? And why are Hitchy and Brat not commenting in their usual style? I miss all of you people.

(I also miss all those whose names I have forgotten remembered but just not written down ;-))

Itna sannata kyun hai bhai???

(4) P.S: I watched ‘Ready‘ yesterday. Total time-pass!! The first half of the movie was funny and had quite a few laughs, and great catchy numbers. The second half was entirely boring. So any of you planning to watch it, have fun 🙂 My Brat cannot stop singing Dhinka Chika and trying to copy Sallu’s moves 😉

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9Y1V5up6ljw

(5) Edited to add: Just read this line on a fan-page on facebook. Lines of appreciation for a very popular male person, from his female fan…

‘….Its been a pleasure sharing with you as to my recent interest which had grown oversize…’ 🙄 🙄 :mrgreen: 🙄

I seriously wonder what she was referring to… any guesses?!!!!!

P.S: For the non-perverted mind: The male was Vah Chef  😉

Btw, I am a huge fan of Vah Chef myself… I enjoy his recipies on Youtube… and most importantly, I looooooooooooove his expression when he tastes his own food 🙂 Priceless and totally enviable 🙂

Happy rest of the week, folks. I am not sure when I will be able to reply to your lovely comments. But please keep writing ….

Categories
Thurs Challenge - picture

Thursday Challenge – Golden

Isn’t there something golden about this picture… or am I being cheeky here?! (Considering I have no pictures of anything else remotely golden 😉 to post for the Thursday Challenge!)

To read more about Egyptian mythology, please click this link.

Categories
Wordless Wed

Wordless Wednesday

 

Warsaw - As the city gets ready to fall asleep...

 

Categories
Incidents Thought and Reason

On weather and forecasts

Back home (and to me, home always means my maternal home. And that, by the way, is a small 2BHK in Chennai, and not some sort of ‘ancestral property’ as the words ‘maternal home’ might unwittingly indicate 😉 )…well, back home, we never EVER checked weather forecasts. It was always hot. Hot, hotter, hottest (as my Mum would describe our Chennai weather). So the question of looking forward to hearing the weather forecast never occurred! To me, ‘weather forecasts’ simply meant a sweet smiling bimbo (sorry!) with absolutely straightened hair, smiling from an NDTV news channel and talking about rain or sun across different parts of India.

So when we moved to the UK, it came as quite a cultural shock to me, that the weather could change practically every hour!! In the peak of summer, for instance, we would step out of our apartment, wearing nothing more than a Tee and jeans. Halfway down the road, the sky would turn dark grey, and strong winds would threaten to fly us away like kites (well, not me, but some of the really thin folks out here!).

Or BBC would forecast ‘heavy rains’, and so we would go out of the house, fully prepared, bundled up in a thick jacket and scarf! Only to realise that it is a really hot day, and yours truly reaches her destination, sweating like a pig (like my friend Pushy says, I haven’t seen a pig sweat, but hey, that’s how the phrase goes…).

 

So what made me write this non-post today? Two things.

One, my friend back in Chennai updated her FB status with something to the effect that her son’s school declared a ‘rain holiday’ but there were no rains!! This took me right back to my childhood.

We lived a stone’s throw away from our school. So whenever there were rains, my sister and I would be almost the first few kids to get to know if school was ‘open’ or ‘closed’. We would wade through the water (yeah, half a day’s rain would flood our narrow lanes. Infact, its pretty much the same situation even today! 🙄 ), reach our school, and look around for a small black notice board, that would announce that school was closed!!! On days when we didn’t find the board, we would trudge sorrowfully back home, pack our bags and head back to school.

Pic courtesy: school.discoveryeducation.com

But on the days that we did find the ‘School Closed’ board, we went ‘Yippeeee’!! We would ever so happily skip back home, announcing loudly ‘Girlie, school closed!‘ to every schoolgirl we found on the way. Since many schoolmates lived in our apartments, if one kid got the ‘good news’ she would often make sure everyone else knew too, by yelling loud from her verandah 😀

And THE BEST PART – Once we were back home, warmed and changed into fresh, dry clothes, the rains would magically disappear!!! Not a drop, half an hour from the ‘rain holiday’ declaration 🙂 So my sis and I used to spend the day, playing quietly, reading or bickering! The walls and ceiling would leak (no, we did not live in a hut, but the walls did leak.. they do even today 😯 ), and the freshly washed clothes wouldn’t dry, but all that was my mother’s concern. For me and my sister, ‘school rain holiday’ meant a ‘free holiday’ 🙂

Schools, however, are quite a bunch of sadists. They would always compensate the holiday by making us work a subsequent Saturday. That was kind of irritating. But hey! We cannot have everything, can we?

Its been raining all day long, and quite appropriately, BBC had predicted we would have ‘sunny spells’, which are yet to happen!

So that’s that about rains and weather forecasts!

The second reason for me writing this post today was Deep’s comment – again on FB – about Blogworld being so quiet these days. I too, find the old-timers 😉 lying low. I miss the fun we used to have during days when Solilo and Indy girl were around. The masti we had on Hitchy Bhai’s blog. With lil Pixie adding sweet comments. And Swaram throwing in some vile ones 😉 Quirky writing some exceptionally tongue-in-cheek posts! Someone called someone else a ‘Comment Monster’ 😉 And it was all just so much fun 🙂 Sigh! I miss those days. Some folks have just taken a sabbatical (from blogging 😉 ), some got married, some just disappeared!

Come back, you all!!

Cheerio folks… like I said, its been raining all day out here, and I need to figure out a way to get hold of some bread!!

x

Categories
Incidents

DDLJ Live!!

Picture this awesome scene from the movie DDLJ – SRK and Kajol are running to catch the train, he hops aboard first, then heroically lends her a hand and she manages to get in too! 

This is pretty much what happened on our recent trip to Disneyland Paris!! 

Well not exactly, but something similar… 

On a sudden whim, we decided on Thursday, to make a quick trip to Disneyland Paris 🙂 

 

Our onward trip was rather uneventful, except for the fact that I (un)wisely decided to take only my old dabba (not so good) camera and leave behind hubby’s new one!! 

Once we boarded the train, the tummy let out a rumble, so we opened out the aloo parathas that were meant for dinner (!!) and gobbled them up, quite oblivious to the glares from fellow-passengers 😉 In fact, I wanted to open even the Achaar and Yogurt (but I wasn’t carrying any of the former, and the latter was a HUGE tub, and even I felt embarassed to dip the paratha into it ;-)) 

As we reached, the weather Gods decided to make our trip rather memorable. We looked out of the train, to find, that everything to our left was Bright and Sunny and absolutely beautiful 🙂 ! While, everything to our right was CLoudy, Dark and morose 😦 🙄 Then, a light drizzle, followed by slightly heavy rain, and in a few minutes, LIGHTNING!! Luckily, the sky cleared up just before we reached our destination – Marne-la-Vallée. 

We had read mixed reviews of our hotel on the internet. So our expectations were not that high! Thankfully!! The room was clean, no doubts, but it was Teeeeeeeeeeeeny Tiiiiiiiny!! There was one little sofa-bed which, once pulled out, left no space to even walk around the room! The bathroom was huge, which was really nice. There was also a tiny kitchenette, which pretty as it sounds, was also rather useful. Typical South Indian that I am, I actually carried a little rice cooker, paruppu-podi (and yogurt ofcourse, which is my staple diet :razz:) 

Saturday morning was rather strange. As we ate our minimal breakfast (yummy croissants with jam) – and I say ‘minimal’ because the hotel didn’t provide fruits or cheese! – a thunder storm had broken out!! It was pouring…and we weren’t quite equipped for it!! All we had was one umbrella between the three of us (but the smart Mommy that I am, I had packed a raincoat for the Brat). 

Anyway, we brave soldiers marched onwards to the mini shuttle that took us to the Disney Park. The local store made some massive business that day via Raincoat sales!!! So we donned our disposable raincoats and went all around the Park. We took a ride in the little train. The MAP looked rather daunting! What with all those mountains, forests, little rivulets and all. But soon, we realised the actual Disney Park wasn’t all that difficult to manouvre around. 

It was amazing, how clean the park remained even with all the rains. There was no litter, no dirt… it was actually magical 😉 

In a couple of hours, the rains stopped, and then we had a ball!! 

We went on several rides. There was one Mad Hatter’s Tea Cups, that spun us round and round. Then, there was this other Merry Go Round. Remember the ones we find on beaches in India? Same thing. Just a little more colourful and cleaner. For a change, instead of hubby and me taking turns, all three of us went on the ride together!! The brat sat on the horse in the middle, while we were on either side. I loved this part!! And to my luck, obviously, when the ride stopped, my horse was high up in the air, and I struggled to get off it!! I am so glad I didn’t fall and make a fool of myself, which I am normally bound to do!! 

Pic courtesy: Google

 

There was this Big Thunder Mountain Train-ride.. which was a breath-taking experience. The train was super speedy (as my brat calls it) and the carriages threatened to THROW us out horizontally!! The train went through tunnels that were PITCH DARK and steeped really high/low in turns!! We were all screaming our lungs out. At one point, I actually thought one of us would just fall into the ravine beside the little hill!! But this was the most memorable ride of all 🙂 Little R loved it 😉 

There were beautiful parades, of all the cartoon characters… Pooh bear, Piglet, Tigger, Mickey and gang, etc…. Infact, I got pretty emotional when I saw all the fantasy Princesses and their respective Princes. I’ve lived on fairy tales all my life, so to see them in ‘pseudo-reality’ was rather moving 🙂 Call me crazy, if you like, but I did get senti!! 

 

We also went in a Maze with a little castle at the top. From our prior experience, we have no luck with Mazes. At Hampton Court palace, we actually forgot to visit the maze!! At Leeds Castle, we did enter the maze, but 30 minutes down the line, we had just made three trips to the ‘EXIT’ and not reached anywhere near the centre! Now, this Disney Maze, for a change, was really quite easy. We found it in about 20-25 minutes and were rather thrilled as we reached the centre!! 

As we sat to refresh ourselves over coffee, there was this HUGE tea-pot from which a little Rabbit would pop out every few minutes. I put R on it to take a photo. After which, there was this other Indian family, with 3 boys all climbing the tea-pot. One of them was standing at the very tip of the spout and YELLING OUT LOUD to his parents to take a pic before he fell down!! The parents were busy drinking something and chatting away happily 🙂 I’m not sure if they even got a picture of the heroic stunt 😯 

By end of day, we were poooooooped!! We got back to the hotel, to eat our precious ‘curd-rice’ 😉 and crash into the lumpy sofa-bed!! 🙄 

Sunday was Hot Hot Hot. We were also tired from the previous day’s excitement, so we spent the first couple of hours, in the Disney Village (window-shopping) and went on a quick ride on a beautiful Hot Air Balloon. It was stationary though..meaning, it was tied down to the base by a thick rope. Made me wonder.. what if.. the rope snapped and we went far far away… gosh.. it was both scary and fascinating. 

We spent the second half of the day at Disney Studios. This had many shows – animation, live puppet shows, etc. etc. And yes, we had a good time at all these. Especially a Motor Stunts show, which I vehemently opposed, but ended up enjoying thoroughly. 

Yeah, so back to our DDLJ in Real Life scene! 

It was 6 pm, and our train was to leave at 7:34. We decided to be extra cautious, and reached the station by 6:30 itself! And waited. And waited. AND waited. There were no signs, and all the announcements were in French, which neither of us knew!! (The only thing we know now, thanks to R, is ‘Bonjour Come Es Stas’). 

At about 7:15, little R had a bad fall – right on his face – cut his lower lip really badly – and was bleeding and howling with pain and shock!! 

And in all that chaos, at around 7:25, the departure board announced that our train was to depart at platform 3. we were right at the gate. But… the gate was closed!!! 

So we ran – literally ran – with bag, baggage and a screaming child – to the other end of the station – and tried to get through the other gate. And guess what? Even that was closed!! 

Then we asked the Info guy, and he pointed out that we had to ‘check-in’. And as we discussed what we ‘should have ideally done’, we saw our train slowly chugging away!! 

The Helpdesk however, on seeing R’s lip wounds, suggested that we catch the local subway to Paris city, change to another train, and then take the Eurostar back to London. 

We were left with no choice!! We again ran ran ran all the way to the ticket counter, managed to get onto the subway and counted every minute as the train slowly slowly slowly pulled into Paris. 

After a heart-stopping and breath-taking one hour, we finally made it to Gare Du Nord station. And guess what? It was 9:05, and the LAST Train to London was to leave at 9:13!!! And, to top it all, there was a serpentine queue for immigration and security check!! 

I tried to get some sympathy from one of the female staff, thinking she would understand our situation with the missed train, baggage and wounded baby!! She was rather unsympathetic though. 

Then Hubby worked his magic on one of the staff, who finally helped us jump the queue. And by this time, it was already 9:20. We were sure that by the time we completed our check-in process, this train too, would have left!! 

Anyway, we continued to run, run and run. So there was my SRK running in front of me, carrying the brat, who was by now, screaming his life out, in pain, shock and sorrow!!!! And me, running right behind, panting, almost about to throw up (sorry for the graphic description) and carrying a trolley and two backpacks and some other junk that I could have easily just left behind!!! The staff watching on, had a taste of DDLJ 🙂 Just that, instead of a lovely Kajol, all they got was a panting fatso 😉 and screeching baby 😯 !! A couple of the staff actually said ‘Don’t worry, you have time!’ :mrgreen: 

And you know what I realised after this incident – Kajol was carrying an EMPTY suitcase!!!! 🙄 Cheats!! 

Like my friend commented on FB, ‘ordinary people huffing and puffing, with REAL luggage, is not romantic at all’!! 😦 

And just as we jumped into the train, the doors shut……..but YAYYYYYY!!! We actually made it!! We reached home by 12:00 am. Exhausted, but so relieved just to be back!! 🙂 

So there ended our Disneyland adventure 🙂 And guess what? No matter how awesome a holiday is, there is nothing better than Home!! 🙂 

Happy Weekending, folks!

Categories
Incidents MommySpeak Thought and Reason

Something here and there

Part I: Inspired by Vimmu’s ‘Once Upon a Time’ series

So I’ve been out of sight for the last two weeks. We had been wanting to see Cairo for almost seven years, and we finally made it! We spent the week before last on a beautiful trip to Egypt. Landed at Cairo on a Sat early morning, and our first stop was the magnificent Pyramids of Giza, and the even more majestic Sphinx.

We spent the next day in Alexandria. Our guide misguided us though! While he claimed it was a ‘day trip to Alex’, we spent almost the entire day travelling by car, and a miserably short One hour in Alex. The Catacombs were intriguiging (the Brat especially loved venturing underground!) , Pompeii’s Pillar was beautiful, and the Gardens were vast. The strawberry milkshake at McDonalds was awesome 😉

We then set sail 🙂 Well, it isn’t as grand as I make it sound. Our ‘Nile cruise’ was on a dusty old ship (with an enchanting name: Sheherazade) that sailed very slowly at night, taking us from Luxor to Edfu, and Aswan. And every stop we got to visit beatiful temples, each steeped in mythology!! Luckily, this time we had a very knowledgeable guide, who (though he insisted we start the tour at 7 AM every day) took a lot of effort to make us understand a bit of Egyptian mythology and culture.

He proved he was a ‘guide’ when he insisted we spend adequate time ‘shopping in the nominated centre’, and once we had bought a couple of souvenirs, he dashed back into the shop (rather too obviously!) to collect his share! 😦

The Nile Cruise was a very restful experience. There wasn’t Internet to distract or TV to occupy, therefore only Nature to enjoy!

We concluded our trip by returning to Cairo, just for a day. We saw the beautiful Mohamed Ali mosque at the Citadel. We made the Brat believe that was the palace of Aladin/Jasmine and that the King of Thieves was waiting to capture any naughty children. So that made him sit quiet 🙂 while we admired the beautiful ceiling/roof of the mosque.

Our trip culminated in the Khan-e-elili bazaar. A shopper’s delight! But then, I was roaming the streets with three surly men (2 guides and my husband), and one surly buy (the Brat, ofcourse), so I had no choice but to restrain the Shopaholic in me 😦 Like I said earlier (on FB), ‘Moral of the story: Do not go shopping with men’!)

And, back to base now, we are still trying to re-adjust to the cold weather. Its been raining, very unlike Spring! But the coming week, is expected to be better, in comparison!

Part II: Inspired by Pragya’s ‘Nothing’ series

Speaking of ‘comparisons’, I am so baffled when I see other mothers.. girls who are hardly 25, being so fiercely competitive about our children. I mean, our kids are only 2 and 3 years old. And they already make comparisons, start judging kids/behaviours/parenting. I have only just started teaching the Alphabet to my child, when someone I met recently started when her child was just 14 months or so. And she pointedly said it to me, and kept prodding me to find out ‘what my child is doing currently’.

I am afraid of such people. I want children to be children. I don’t want a genius in my son. And I certainly don’t want a bookworm. All I want is for him to remain enthusiastic, happy and gung-ho. I am probably complacent… ignorant… even stupid!

I know that everything is a rat-race. I know my child would have to participate too. Just, not now.. not so soon!!

Cheerio, people. Enjoy your long weekend. We stayed indoors today, and Sky TV betrayed us by not sending a signal! So we had our revenge by watching two movies – this one for the fourth time! and this for the first – in a row 🙂 and hope to see more tomorrow.

Ta!!

Categories
Poem

Our dream holiday – Rotten Poem # 3

Bags are packed, we are ready to fly,
Over the miles to hill-tops high.

Bread, butter, jam we have taken,
Pizzas/burgers are unhealthy when eaten.

The taxi comes late, making us angry,
Baby begins to cry, she is hungry!

The airport is finally in sight,
We unload the luggage with all our might.

Ouch! What a long queue to check-in,
Mars and Venus quibble amid the din.

At last, the uniformed girl greets us,
Takes our e-tickets and creates a fuss.

“You are overweight”, she says to me,
What is her problem, if I’m Kg-ninety ?!!!

“Your luggage is too much”, she loudly says,
We beg and plead, ignoring people’s stares.

She finally agrees to let us load,
The bags we seem to have filled with gold!

So there we are, ready to go,
To our dream destination, our faces aglow.

But the vile woman, serves a fatal blow,
And asks us, for our photo ID to show!

“Er..um…we’re not carrying it”, said I,
“Well then Mister, you’re not going to fly”!

“That ain’t fair”, I rave and rant,
“Sorry, Sir”, comes the rehearsed, plastic chant.

After a long scuffle, we finally go,
Back to a familiar “Home-Sweet-Home” door.

Categories
Awards Short story

A rumbling, deep down.

I vividly remember that Sunday. The sun was blazing, though it was just the onset of summer. The park was brimming with happy families. Children frolicking in their bright and colourful summer outfits, parents lazing around the cafe, sipping mugs of chilled beer, and security men keeping vigil on the little monkeys.

It was then, that I first saw her. Like she had stepped right out of a fairy tale. Golden hair curled into little ringlets. Blushing pink lips. A deep dimple forming in her cheeks when she laughed that tinkling laugh of hers. The boys hovered around her like bees. They vied with each other, to crack jokes and make her laugh. One stylishly ran his hand through his hair, another leaned on the wall with a macho casualness, the third kept on his silly non-stop banter. She was patient with all of them. I watched, silently, from a distance, knowing I didn’t stand a chance.

I was already, hopelessly in love with her. But didn’t have the courage to do anything but watch from afar. ‘Oh ! Unrequited love. How often will you pierce my heart ?’ They say beauty is only skin deep. Why then, does nobody want to look beneath, and find the real me ? The warm, caring, loving soul that lies deep within. This is such a materialistic world, with shallow people.

My helplessness and anger made me feel hot, and the sun didn’t do much to help. So I decided to go for a swim in the pond. My stomach was rumbling.

It never fails to amaze me, this stomach…so irreverent to the emotions of the person. No matter what one feels – anger,sorrow, frustration – all of these take a bow before hunger pangs. And happiness, oh, that’s another excuse to gluttony.

The water was cool and refreshing, as I glided through it. I steered clear of the children, for their high-pitched chatter, cries and laughter that earlier seemed so endearing, now only aggravated the ache in my head.

I swam the entire length of the pond, when all of a sudden, I heard a shriek. The group of bees, er, boys, were gathered in a nervous bunch. People were talking in loud whispers.

“How did she fall ? Does she know how to swim ?”

“Mummy, are there dangerous creatures in the pond ?”

“Poppy, where are you ?”. (So, her name was “Poppy”).

“Somebody save her..please !”

Now was my chance. Nobody had noticed me yet. However, I was never one for limelight. I gallantly ducked into the water, and searched for Poppy. Gnawing hunger pangs had already drained the bulk of my energy, and I couldn’t see much, but I didn’t give up.

‘If I could spot her, but once … if I could just get hold of her, and never let her go !’

And then, as if in answer to my prayers, I saw a bit of pink cloth moving gracefully among the weeds. I swam with all my might, and saw Poppy trying to swim upwards towards the light. It was very silent, there, in what seemed to be beneath the rest of the world.

My heart pounded with excitement. I couldn’t help, but admire her to heart’s content. Her golden ringlets waved slowly, her graceful hands and feet moved vigorously. She looked charming … almost delicious. I dared to go very close to her. She caught sight of me. Our eyes met, and instantly locked. She opened her mouth … and let out a noiseless scream.

Then came this final rumble, from the depths of my stomach. I didn’t have a choice.

As I snapped up my lunch that day, I shed tears.

People called it “crocodile tears”.

(Shortlisted as a finalist for a Sulekha EYC contest – Didn’t win it though!)