Categories
Humour Incidents Thought and Reason

Bits, Bobs and Sexy legs

Ok, if you are one of those few people who re-read the title just now, for your kind information, it is ‘bIts, bObs and sexy legs’. Perverts… 🙄

I miss blogging! I miss reading posts by my blog-buddies, I miss commenting, I miss replying to the very kind comments on my own blog! 24-hours a day is simply not enough! There is so much to do, so much to not do… and hardly any time to write. So here are a few bits and bobs….

1) Just read this yesterday: It takes all the running you can do, to keep in the same place. How very true. You simply have to run faster than ever before, just to remain in the same place. I thought this was by Kotler, however, Wiki told me otherwise. To read the source of this brilliant line, do click this link.

2) We were browsing the ‘Father’s Day‘ Cards at Tesco today, and the young security boy commented about how ‘people are marketing every single thing!‘ and how ‘there is a day for every thing and every one’. I agreed , nodding wisely, until he blurted, ‘There’s a fathers day, a mother’s day… at this rate, they will introduce a Child’s day!‘ I guess this boy hadn’t heard of ‘Children’s Day’ 😆 😆 😆

3) On sexy legs… (Ah…. finally!)

I actually went to the gym last month. Twice so far! And I actually enjoyed it. Now having sweated out for two hours (one hour each session), I instantly felt ‘fitter’ than ever before.

So, there is this pedestrian crossing that I have to cross every day, to drop the Brat off at school. There is a glass wall on the opposite side of the road.

Now, the Brat and I were standing on this side of the road, waiting for the traffic signal to change, so we could cross over to the other side. And voila!! In the glass wall, I saw the most amazing reflection of my legs. Looking lean and long in those dark blue denim jeans. I was amazed at the results of my two hours of gym-ing. I gazed at the reflection for a couple of seconds, sighing, wondering why I didn’t begin exercising earlier. And then – guess what happened next….

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And then.. the pair of legs turned around and started to walk away!!! 🙄

Despite my average levels of sanity, I could not – for the life of me – figure out (pun unintended) how my sexy legs could do that … Until I realised those belonged to someone else. .. to a real girl who was actually standing behind the glass wall and whose upper half was hidden by a board that contained the tube map 😦

🙄 🙄 😆 😆

It was all I could do, to stop myself from clicking a picture. Saks would have done a great job, but hey, I am not her.

On that note, where the hell is she????? And that reminds me, where the hell is every one else? Where are Vimmu, Solilo, Indyeah? Where are Pixie, Swar, Mon and Uma? And why are Hitchy and Brat not commenting in their usual style? I miss all of you people.

(I also miss all those whose names I have forgotten remembered but just not written down ;-))

Itna sannata kyun hai bhai???

(4) P.S: I watched ‘Ready‘ yesterday. Total time-pass!! The first half of the movie was funny and had quite a few laughs, and great catchy numbers. The second half was entirely boring. So any of you planning to watch it, have fun 🙂 My Brat cannot stop singing Dhinka Chika and trying to copy Sallu’s moves 😉

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9Y1V5up6ljw

(5) Edited to add: Just read this line on a fan-page on facebook. Lines of appreciation for a very popular male person, from his female fan…

‘….Its been a pleasure sharing with you as to my recent interest which had grown oversize…’ 🙄 🙄 :mrgreen: 🙄

I seriously wonder what she was referring to… any guesses?!!!!!

P.S: For the non-perverted mind: The male was Vah Chef  😉

Btw, I am a huge fan of Vah Chef myself… I enjoy his recipies on Youtube… and most importantly, I looooooooooooove his expression when he tastes his own food 🙂 Priceless and totally enviable 🙂

Happy rest of the week, folks. I am not sure when I will be able to reply to your lovely comments. But please keep writing ….

Categories
Humour Incidents Thought and Reason

Five steps to looking HAEP and KHEWL

Five easy steps for a woman to look haaeeeep and kheeeewl.

1- Wear a pair of oversized sun-glasses

glassI had a severe eye infection about 10 days ago, and I was forced to borrow a pair of over-sized sun glasses from a neighbour, and I must say, I looked quite different! Was impressed myself, and I knew others were too, as people gave me THE look, you know! (Atleast, they didn’t drop any coins into my hands, so I assume it was all for good 😉 ) Anyway, so, you go, find that pair and make sure you wear it on at all times…when you are waiting for the bus or train, when you are paying your bill at the till. And wear it especially during window-shopping…then nobody will think you are a kanjoos-makhichoos! They will probably think you are a film-star or something, and will start hoping that you actually peep into their store! He he! So wear it at all times, even when it is raining 😉

2- Find an oversized handbag

Gone are the days of mid-sized handbags, into which we pushed that bulging mulberry-bayswater-metalliccoin-purse, dried compact, broken Lakme lipstick, army-transmitter-sized mobile, etc. You must find one really large, oversized handbag, into which you can dump just about anything you see or like (Just not a poodle). And voila! Now your bag can hold loads of useless things, like er..er..say, a wallet with expired credit cards and ex-visiting cards (you know, the ones you managed to have printed before you were kicked out of your job), a dirty nail file from which flakes drop down like snow, the hair straightener that almost burnt your hair(!!), crappy romantic novel, electronic Sudoku that you never attempt, I-Pod ofcourse, etc. etc. Talking of which, I came across this interesting article on the internet. P.S: The more outrageous the colour, the better! Like say, replace that boring maroon with a disgustingly vibrant purple or mustard (a very dignified term for something that is crap, er, literally!) or a bag with a metallic finish or something on those lines. Get the drift?

Remember, you have to get the bag (and other accessories) do the talking! Or else you will, and that would be a disaster 😉

3- CC or TT outfit

shirtWondering what this is? Its either a crisp cotton shirt (My personal favourite would be white!) or tight T-shirts with tiny sleeves (in those days, the tailor down the street used to call this Mega-Sleeves… I wonder why, as they were not Mega in any way! Or did he mean the arms? Eughhh…!) tee

Anyway, both of these outfits will give that uber-cool look. Guaranteed! Definitely not loose, roomy clothes. The fit has to be ‘just right’. And with an outfit like this, you just cannot go wrong! (Images: Courtesy karenmiller dot com)

4- Accessorize

SPL31947_008For heaven’s sake, get rid of those ‘matching-matching kalar-kalar yearrings’. Gone are the days of wearing colourful mid-sized earrings to match the dress! These days, you either stick to an elegant Solitaire (yeah, just look at Ash Rai Bach) or classy chandelier or glass/bead earrings.

Again, depending on your outfit, you might need a nice long glass bead chain, that reaches all the way till your waist (even if you don’t have one..er..the waist, I mean 😉 )

 

  

5- Crowning glory – Loose and Boots

And the finale – One swift stroke changes you from Behenji to Hot Babe. And that is: Hair.You gotta leave it loose. Look at our tinsel town stars!

To prove my point, take a look at the foll. ‘stars’:-

1) Rani Aunty

2) Ash Didi

3) Asin Behenji

rani aunty     ash didi    asin

Now, look at the transformation! Notice the Hairdo and the Solitaire!! SEE!

1) Ash hottie                                    2) Asin coolie…oops…I just meant COOL-ie 🙂

     ash hottie                                               asin2

(Apologies for not being able to locate a picture of a hot Rani, guess even WWW is bored of her!)

(Pics courtesy desihits dot com)

Even if you look like crap, atleast you can ‘assume’ you look good! If you really want, you could probably keep the hair off your face with those oversized glasses. But the most important thing is, (seemingly) unruly (but carefully crafted) strands of hair, must keep falling about your face, even at the risk of you looking like that poodle! And, you just HAVE to remember, to keep adjusting your hair, and pushing those strands away from your eyes, and behind your ears, to let that solitaire sparkle the wits out of the person in front of you!

boots1Shoes, ofcourse, are very crucial in deciding the look. So, if you go for the Tight-Tees cum Smart Jacket, then opt for snazzy boots with a little feminine frill, perhaps? peeptoeIf its the crisp cottons, then choose smart shoes/sandals. Sandals, again, must either fully cover your feet, OR a delicate peep-toe.

 

 

So, lovely girls, go and get that haeeeep look and tell me how it goes.

Will try it out myself too, if its a success 😉