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Chup, bad girl


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‘Bad uncle...’ the child whispers, shifting uneasily.

Mother glances at Neighbour – kind and respectable. No, he wouldn’t!!

She nudges her 6-year old irritably, ‘Chup*… Bad girl!

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(An attempt to tell a story in Haiku form)

Innumerable cases of child abuse are not stopped simply because we do not believe our children enough. We brush their fears aside, thinking they are baseless. They aren’t. They never are. If a child feels that there is ‘something wrong’ or ‘something bad’ – a touch, a comment, or even a look…  that just makes him/her feel uncomfortable, but is unable to express it, it is our damn duty to take up the matter seriously and investigate, and protect our children.

This post has been written for the Child Sexual abuse awareness month theme run by the Chennai Bloggers Club.

* ‘chup’ – ‘quiet’ or ‘shut up’

23 replies on “Chup, bad girl”

This is the problem with parents. They are unwilling to listen to the child and fail to ignore the uneasiness on the child’s body language.
True Vishal…And children can make out the difference…they do know when someone is making them feel uncomfortable… we ought to give the kids more credit and importance to their words and emotions.
Parents must be education and the problem is our society who has always encouraged to keep the child’s mouth shut and vultures laugh all the way.
😦
Cheers
Vishal

Small incident but story of almost everyone – experienced, seen or heard.
‘almost everyone’ – How true OHW!! The other day, a friend happened to mention that most of us in India have been sexually abused at some point of time, so there is nothing shocking about it.

And in a country where we are trustful of everybody around – the smiling neighbours, the attentive watchman, the punctual driver, the over pleasing house help, the close or distant relatives etc etc, most of the time they breach the trust. If only we can trust our children more.
Really.. if we could just believe in our children more….

It is a sense of fear and embarrassment coupled together.. Fear that my kid has been touched and ‘polluted’, and embarrassment that I have call the person out while he or she has a clean public image.
You hit the nail on the head Santulan! It is indeed fear and embarassment, and in the process we forget that the children are scarred for life! These memories don’t disappear, they just fade, but they are always there, at the back of the mind!!
In this case, both the fear and embarrassment are baseless because not only are they wrong, but they pile upon the kid who is already suffering from the hands of this person.
Very sad…. 
I wonder why parents put the image of someone else before their own kids’ safety
Exactly!!! Exactly.

When I finally told, my mother asked me if I was sure I hadn’t “dreamed” the incidents. My trust in adults was completely shattered.
Ouch… that hurts Sylvia… it really goes. Why can’t parents believe in their own children, instead of believing in some stranger?!!

Everyone seems to just ‘not’ take these things seriously na 😦 Sometimes, I think parenting is a very tough job..actually make it ‘most times’
Sigh… could we make that ‘all the time’?!

But thankfully at least little bunch of parents are now aware and act accordingly, they have learnt to trust their child and are learning to read what that simple sentence “bad uncle” means…. but the best day would be when more and more people would do this…. ….

Oh yes very true, and there is definitely more awareness these days, but the ‘taboo’ and ‘stigma’ still forces people to brush things under the carpet!!

This kind of behavioral is just a resultant of ignorance and embarrassment! I wish parents become a little more aware and show trust towards their children!

I love the story! Simple but yet powerful words 🙂

very beautifully conveyed Pal. Ironic isnt is it that we get carried away by the false images that these ‘respectable’ men portray, but silence our own kids as being hyper-imaginative and turn a deaf ear to them. Sad indeed!

They only do this because they know they will get away with it. The victim is a defenceless child who can not do anything to them and those who can are as you said more worried about the image in society.
 Totally agree with you on that. Crimes continue because these rascals are so confident that nothing will ever happen to them!!!!
I also think that it’s fault of our society who does not respect the victims of any kind of abuse, and the way they view the whole abuse as a fault of the victim in question, and I think that is wrong. This is a main reason why they brush this under the carpet.
Absolutely right, Harry… I wonder if the change has already started… and how many years/decades will we have to wait until this change is complete?

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