Thought and Reason

Band Baajaa And Imperfect Brides

I am yet to forgive my two best friends for what they did to me at my wedding. Now, don’t go getting any ideas. My buddies dragged me to a certain beauty parlour and got me a mini-makeover. I still cringe when I look at my wedding album. I don’t recognise myself, with all that face-paint on

This is exactly why I feel bad for the brides who participate in the new makeover show ‘Band Baajaa Bride’. I am a complete sucker for makeover shows, and I was excited to catch an episode of this show, where the famous designer Sabyasachi Mukherjee creates a grand outfit for the chosen bride-to-be.

On the face of it, the show seems like an amazing opportunity. Having a stunning dress designed by a top designer, looking like an Indian queen on your wedding day, adorned in all the finery, and getting all this for free ) – a dream come true for any bride.

So what is it that I am cribbing about?

Just this – the show takes the natural charm out of a girl and replaces it with stupid and needless glamour! Almost as if saying, your natural perfection IS NOT GOOD ENOUGH. You NEED to be an artificially enhanced doll. Or a live advertisement for designer wear!

The episode I watched featured an extremely pretty bride-to-be, with lovely long tresses and an innocence that radiated. She wanted a ‘lehenga-choli’ that was not ‘red’ in colour. And she wanted to ‘look REAL’ – just the way she was.

What do you think Team Band Baaja did? They took her to a cosmetic surgeon to make her lips look fuller (that by the way, looked perfectly fine to me), chopped off her ‘boring’ tresses to make her look younger (apparently her fiancé also said ‘she was pretty but not glamorous’), and created a very regal wedding outfit – in red.

The bride looked gorgeous. The outfit, the styling, the accessories were all perfect.

But somewhere down the line, that pretty girl who had walked into the show wanting to look ‘REAL’ had been lost. She now looked like a perfect Hindi-serial actress.

And in place of a naturally charming young girl, we had someone who represented the designer dreams of Bollywood. Instead of simple, realistic, and attainable charm, we now had glitz, sparkle and heavy work that is simply not attainable to most of population.

It is this stereotyped concept of ‘perfection’ that immensely bothers me. A show like this makes a bride believe she NEEDS a grand makeover, failing which she would not look ‘good enough’ on her special day.

Yes, you can say this is a case of sour grapes. There was no such makeover show when I was a bride 😉 😉

But on a serious note, isn’t this the problem with us? We seek perfection in everything that is superficial. A lame child, a dark girl, an obese boy – instant ridicule. Every matrimonial advert reads ‘Wanted: Slim, Fair, Good-looking bride for boy’.

How about people who do not fit the bill – are they not worthy enough of consideration?

Interestingly, we do not make any attempt in perfection ourselves, in terms of skill, education, vocational training, etc. We don’t aim to stand up for anything worthwhile. Instead, we watch makeover shows, dreaming of looking perfect, but not bothering to be perfect in the things that do matter.

Coming back to the show itself, not all is wrong with it. Yes, it does a huge deal of advertising for designer-outfits and designer-jewellery. But despite that, the anchor Team comes across as friendly and enthusiastic.

I loved what Sabyasachi himself said on the show – ‘a beautiful bride does not need Sabyasachi’ – That was incredibly humble and delightfully charming. I loved watching brides weave their dreams.

But I don’t like the fact that there is a huge chance, that it makes people believe they are imperfect ‘just the way they are’. That, is dangerous.

So what do you think?

21 replies on “Band Baajaa And Imperfect Brides”

Well I beleive that no one is perfect, and using all artificial means sure will not make one perfect.. rather god made us all beautiful , we jsut need the eyes to see it .. NOW if we are so idiots that we cant see the beauty than its our fault ..

totally agree that too much of fashion spoils it tooo

havenot seen the show so dont know about it much.. I am not a fan of branded names at all, dont know why people are so much after it ..

It is human nature to be dissatisfied with one’s own self .. the slimming and cosmetic industry rely heavily on this truth. As a person who rarely uses make up, the parlours and the designer labels (with their price tags) scare me. I havent seen this reality show … must check it out at least once

So so true…one good thing was that at the wedding at my place, I was clear I am not going to do anything to my face..unfortunately at RD’s place during the reception (bloody waste of money!) his bhabhi made me her personal experimental doll and decked me up with so much of plaster on the face that my father asked me ‘Did you see RM anywhere” (errr..okie thats an exaggeration, but I look hideous!)

Interestingly, we do not make any attempt in perfection ourselves, in terms of skill, education, vocational training, etc. We don’t aim to stand up for anything worthwhile – SUPER line 🙂

Hmmm… I agree to what you said… But one question that wonders me if she wanted it to be so real why did she participated in that show… The act was of choice not compulsion, isn’t it?

You somehow seem to have mastered the art of hitting the nail on the head!!!

I must tell you given a great deal of thought to it (because all these things never crossed my head when I watched the show)!

This was my favorite line “Interestingly, we do not make any attempt in perfection ourselves, in terms of skill, education, vocational training, etc. We don’t aim to stand up for anything worthwhile”.

I have been following your blog for a while now, and you have inspired me to have a blog of my own 🙂

How very true – I prefer the real beauties to the manufactured ones any day!! As much as I do like the concept of this show – I really think they should stick to enhancing the bride’s natural features rather than resort to cosmetic procedures – which is a BIG NO. Oh and btw you will be amazed to see to what extent the to be brides these days can go, to emulate popular stars and hairstyles etc – so it’s not always the brainwaves of the stylists on the show :O 😛

I have seen this show too and I was also very excited knowing that Sabyasachi would be actually designing something. But on seeing 2 episodes, one I do not believe he is designing anything, just giving the bride something from their collection. And, second, they just ensure you look like a Bollywood star, as apparently thats the only reason you would have come to the show!

As you say… the innocence of every bride and the beauty of a girl is just no where visible.

Quite harsh, this world.

By the way, I believe such profiling is an evolutionary basic instinct, more to propagate our species. Similar things happen in the animal world, it’s just that the human race thinks we’re above all of this!

In any case, this TV show is possibly a smaller evil as compared to the soap / shampoo / deo advertisements of today!

Loved this post… Its ok if people figure out that they are imperfect because no one is perfect anyways but its important that we build a certain level of comfort with our imperfections…

One of my colleagues had suggested this show for me. I was like, no thank you I do not wish to be put on display, although the Sabyasachi gown is a very VERY tempting choice!

As long as the show is taken in spirit it is supposed to be taken in, it’s fine. Just a makeover and fun time for a bride-to-be and the opportunity to have people trailing behind (for FREE) with only one intention…to make you look your best. Sounds fine too. And you get a fabulous designer dress to boot!

But then problem is, like you said, it also feeds into the consciousness of how looking glamourous is the most important thing. Looking pretty is FINE…why is there the need to be glamourous? I feel that’s too much of commercialisation…. Dunno maybe just my opinion…

Where does this show air? Sounds rather cheesy to me. I agree with your views on it actually – you know, all the decking up and designer wear is all very good but how bad would it be if you check out the wedding albums years later and find yourself hard to recognize? Eee! These shows seem more about advertising and screening big cutouts of the sponsors. Not my thing.

true.. I tried watching an episode, but found it very cheesy and atificial!
I don’t know if you remember or not, but a few years back there was this make over show on Travel & Living hosted by 2 British ladies – now that show was awesome!
They kept it real and the women and men always looked real and not artificial even after the makeover!

I hardly dress up on normal days .. it’s only face powder and bindi most of the times and thankfully, my mausis did a very good job of doing up the ‘Bride Me’ too the same way, with little additions ofcos 😉 It was during the reception that beautician took charge and inspite of telling her not to overdo it, Su asked me if I was the same girl he had been married to sometime before 😛 😛 Hmmpf!

Not seen the show and probably will not do that too, but I am realllllllly interested in seeing ur wedding pics!

I agree with you. I have never watched this show and I love Sabyasachi creations and having someone help you look your best sounds like a good idea but still I wonder if that is really looking like ‘oneself’… on the other hand, the new look might become a new, normal look, and that is fine too. But it could make other brides also feel like they need to look glamorous too…

Eww.. is there a show for even that? I wasnt aware of it.. my engagement snaps got spoiled because some lady did gaudy makeup.. thankfully my wedding pics came alright since I have very little makeup..
Oh yes there is a show for that!!! Lucky you, atleast you learnt from your engagement. I didn’t!!!

I agree! They pretty much kill the innocence, and then present em like some model from a distant land.
Whatever happened to ‘real’ity TV?
Spot on! The ‘reality’ is clearly replaced by ‘reel-ity’!

So, what do you think?

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