Five steps to looking HAEP and KHEWL


Five easy steps for a woman to look haaeeeep and kheeeewl.

1- Wear a pair of oversized sun-glasses

glassI had a severe eye infection about 10 days ago, and I was forced to borrow a pair of over-sized sun glasses from a neighbour, and I must say, I looked quite different! Was impressed myself, and I knew others were too, as people gave me THE look, you know!ย (Atleast, they didn’t drop any coins into my hands, so I assume it was all for good ๐Ÿ˜‰ )ย Anyway, so, you go, find that pair and make sure you wear it on at all times…when you are waiting for theย bus or train, when you areย paying your bill at the till. And wear it especially during window-shopping…then nobody will think you are a kanjoos-makhichoos! They will probably think you are a film-star or something, and will start hoping that you actually peep into their store! He he!ย So wear it at all times,ย even when it is raining ๐Ÿ˜‰

2- Find an oversized handbag

Gone are the days of mid-sized handbags, into which we pushed that bulging mulberry-bayswater-metalliccoin-purse, dried compact, broken Lakme lipstick, army-transmitter-sized mobile, etc. You must find one reallyย large, oversized handbag, into which you can dump just about anything you see or like (Just not a poodle). And voila! Now your bag can hold loads of useless things, likeย er..er..say, a wallet with expired credit cards and ex-visiting cards (you know, the ones you managed to have printed before you were kicked out of your job), a dirty nail file from which flakes drop down like snow, the hair straightener that almost burnt your hair(!!), crappy romantic novel, electronic Sudoku that you never attempt, I-Pod ofcourse, etc. etc. Talking of which, I came across this interesting article on the internet. P.S: The more outrageous the colour, the better! Like say, replace that boring maroon with a disgustingly vibrant purple or mustard (a very dignified term for something that is crap, er, literally!) or a bag with a metallic finish or something on those lines. Get the drift?

Remember, you have to get the bag (and other accessories) do the talking! Or else you will, and that would be a disaster ๐Ÿ˜‰

3- CC or TT outfit

shirtWondering what this is? Its either a crisp cotton shirt (My personal favourite would be white!) or tight T-shirts with tiny sleeves (in those days, the tailor down the street used to call this Mega-Sleeves… I wonder why, as they were not Mega in any way! Or did he mean the arms? Eughhh…!) tee

Anyway, both of these outfits will give that uber-cool look. Guaranteed! Definitely not loose, roomy clothes. The fit has to be ‘just right’.ย And with an outfit like this, you just cannot go wrong! (Images: Courtesy karenmiller dot com)

4- Accessorize

SPL31947_008For heaven’s sake, get rid of those ‘matching-matching kalar-kalar yearrings’. Gone are the days of wearing colourful mid-sized earrings to match the dress! These days, you either stick to an elegant Solitaire (yeah, just look at Ash Rai Bach) or classy chandelier or glass/bead earrings.

Again, depending on your outfit, you might need a nice long glass bead chain, that reaches all the way till your waist (even if you don’t have one..er..the waist, I mean ๐Ÿ˜‰ )

ย 

ย ย 

5- Crowning glory – Loose and Boots

And the finale – One swift stroke changes you from Behenji to Hot Babe. And that is: Hair.You gotta leave it loose. Look at our tinsel town stars!

To prove my point, take a look at the foll. ‘stars’:-

1) Rani Aunty

2) Ash Didi

3) Asin Behenji

rani auntyย ย ย ย  ash didiย ย ย  asin

Now, look at the transformation! Notice the Hairdo and the Solitaire!! SEE!

1) Ash hottieย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย 2) Asin coolie…oops…I just meant COOL-ie ๐Ÿ™‚

ย ย ย ย  ash hottieย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย  ย ย  asin2

(Apologies for not being able to locate a picture of a hot Rani, guess even WWW is bored of her!)

(Pics courtesy desihits dot com)

Even if you look like crap, atleast you can ‘assume’ you look good!ย If you really want, you could probably keep the hair off your face with those oversized glasses. But the most important thing is, (seemingly) unruly (but carefully crafted) strands of hair, must keep falling about your face, even at the risk of you looking like that poodle! And, you just HAVE to remember, to keep adjusting your hair, and pushing those strands away from your eyes, and behind your ears, to let that solitaire sparkle the wits out of the person in front of you!

boots1Shoes, ofcourse, are very crucial in deciding the look. So, if you go for the Tight-Tees cum Smart Jacket, then opt for snazzy boots with a little feminine frill, perhaps? peeptoeIf its the crisp cottons, then choose smart shoes/sandals. Sandals, again, must either fully cover your feet, OR a delicate peep-toe.

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ย 

So, lovely girls, go and get that haeeeep look and tell me how it goes.

Will try it out myself too, if its a success ๐Ÿ˜‰

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28 thoughts on “Five steps to looking HAEP and KHEWL

  1. OOOOHHHHH !!!! That’s Uber Cool, Pal !!!!

    Just loved all the tit bits of info !!!! And I’ve the over-sized sun-glasses – Thank God – shld now run to buy the others. Thanks a ton, for suggesting the solitaire – how did you know that’s what I’ve been aiming now-a-days ????? ๐Ÿ™‚

    Will keep u updated on all the related buys !!!!

    Me: Yes!! First ofcourse ๐Ÿ™‚ How do you girls do it? I always end up being LAST to read and comment, EVERYWHERE! Boo hoo :-(((

    And thank you for appreciating all those tidbits…yes, please do keep me posted on the shopping expedition!!

  2. I am such a behenji then!! ๐Ÿ˜‰
    If I wear a big over size coolong glass, then for sure I need a white stick with bell in my hands! For I literally cannot see without my specs! ๐Ÿ˜›

    Hair let loose – then people will think that something is wrong with me – disorganized, wildly flying hair!!!!!!!!!!!!! ๐Ÿ˜€ ๐Ÿ˜€ ๐Ÿ˜€

    LOL!!
    Too good a post Pallu!!!! ๐Ÿ˜‰

    ๐Ÿ˜†

    Me: Oh please! You are talking to a certified behenji anyway ๐Ÿ™‚ LOL at your predicament on the glasses. OK so you can substitute that with a pair of designer frame spectacle glasses, no? As for flying hair, I cannot even crib about that, as I have only a few strands, and even they fall flat ๐Ÿ˜ฆ Thank you for enjoying the post, Pixie darling!

      1. ๐Ÿ™„

        See, this is what happens when one tells the truth! ๐Ÿ˜› ๐Ÿ˜› ๐Ÿ˜›
        Seriously Pallu – you are no behenji…

        Me: Awwwww….send me your address, you are in for a BIIIIIG treat! ๐Ÿ™‚ ๐Ÿ™‚

      2. Pixie, try wearing contacts – then you can have the super cool look by wearing those huge sun glasses !!! What say ???? ๐Ÿ™‚

        Me: Pix: Personally, I have always thought people who wear glasses look way smarter than the unspectacled geek! Contacts are ofcourse an option, But a designer frame like the ancient Amitabh Bachan’s in Cheeni Kum also does the trick!

        1. Ums, I love wearing glasses, so I’m fine with it ๐Ÿ™‚ ๐Ÿ™‚
          I really don’t like contact lenses ๐Ÿ˜›

          Me: Kudos, girl. That’s the way ๐Ÿ™‚

  3. Does this mean that after the “On Therapy” post, you chose (b)? ๐Ÿ™‚

    Cheers,

    Quirky Indian

    Me: You cheeky monkey (literally, eh?). Know what? I threw two big cardboard boxes of useless stuff, and replaced it with new shopping. By the way, do read the last line of my post. You girls/guys have to try this and let me know if it works, so I can get a makeover myself ๐Ÿ˜‰

  4. Now thats cool…..and I seriously don’t understand the idea of the Oversized handbag….

    I have seen ladies with the bag as big as they can manage the inventories of an entire store within that. And the best part is they would reply with something like- “Yes I always carry ‘The Item’ in my handbag” and then they will spend half an hour searching for it in the handbag ๐Ÿ˜›

    Me: LOL at that. Ofcourse, what else did you expect? The bags are only meant to DUMP loads of stuff, not to retrieve them! Duh!!

  5. that’s both “Haep” and “Kwel”, babes!

    Me: Oh thank you, for visiting and leaving lovely feedback. A comment from you always makes my day ๐Ÿ™‚

    1. Absolutely, Ganga! Just remember to keep your nose high up in the air! And put on a fake accent too ๐Ÿ˜‰

      Btw, Gangu, you already have the look. You know.. the sun-glasses perched high up, the elegant solitaire, et al. So all you need , is a bit of snobbery ๐Ÿ˜‰

  6. Hahahahahahahhahahah, lemme see what I’ve already got :
    Pair of cool shoes check
    Oversized sunglasses : No chance. I wear glasses and there itself: I kill any prospect for all the other steps to work coz we all know boys dont make passes at girls who wear glasses ๐Ÿ˜€ ๐Ÿ˜€

    Me: Pummy, shoes are good enough! Get an eccentric-looking designer frame in an outrageous colour, girl! That should do the trick ๐Ÿ˜‰

  7. Hey Pallav: I have been following your post quite regularly … tons of fun! As for this article, toss in a manicured nails and a fitted jacket and … ladies and gentleman we have a fashionista ๐Ÿ™‚

    Me: Anu, so good to see you here! And thanks for those invaluable tips!! Which reminds me of an incident. A few of us were at a vendor review, and one senior lady tripped on the stairs. While she almost sprained her ankle, all she said was ‘Ewwwww….my nails!! I just had them done last week’. ?!!!!?!!!***!!?? ๐Ÿ™„ ๐Ÿ™„ ๐Ÿ™„

  8. Soooooooper post,Pal! ROFL!
    Me: Thank you, Deeps ๐Ÿ™‚
    you know I always thought those BIG glasses that our Aish auntie and Ranididi wore were to hide their black circles or the scars from the near-blinded thrashing by a certain khan or the talli-redness after the previous night’s booze-party ๐Ÿ˜‰
    Now I realize theres so much of Keeewlness too attached to them ๐Ÿ˜†
    Me: ROFL at that ๐Ÿ™‚ ๐Ÿ™‚ ๐Ÿ™‚

    I love big handbags though.In fact I need one for all those items that you mentioned already plus an extra pair of clothing for namnam plus my scribbling pad,plus all the laundry bills/telephone cards/ATM slips that get dumped in like souvenirs. On second thoughts a duffel bag would suit me better,right?? ๐Ÿ™„

    Me: Duffel bag!! Ha ha ho ho ๐Ÿ™‚ To be completely honest with you, the fashionista that I am, I actually carry an old faded rucksack/backpack. And the only item of make up is an equally ancient broken lipstick!!

    Don’t you think people like us are way happier than those who are constantly worried about their looks and their locks and their admirers?!!!

  9. Ha ha… nice post ๐Ÿ™‚

    I know… what we do in the name of fashion! !

    Me: Thank you, Aathira! Fashion is defined by a very small set of rich people. Which makes it so skewed!

  10. hmm.. so you have been searching around .. to get the ‘cool’ look. Victoria Beckham wears massive yes massive sunglasses and they are sooo not cool on her..

    Me: He he, you think so? Anyway, she is at Tussauds. Glasses or not!! Some people have it all, eh?

    let me see how ‘cool’ I am

    I have large handbags though and guess what? one is mustard – you’ll find nappies, wipes, nappy bag, tissues, cheese sticks, apple, milk bottle in it… err a faux changing bag basically..

    Me: ROFL! I used to have one too. That too a FREE Pampers one. How uncool!!

    the idea of the solitaire for the ‘cool’ look is brill – for someone who is not much into jewellery.. God I waited so long for this .. less is more
    Me: Goood, gooood, send me the pics ๐Ÿ™‚

    love the CC, wish I had the figure for it
    Me: Ofcourse you do. Now now, don’t go about fishing ๐Ÿ˜‰

    those shoes .. are they meant for walking?
    Me: ROFL again. Yes, walking, climbing, ramp walking, whatever. As for me, needless to say, I trip even while wearing flat sandals!

  11. hardly understood by me…. not my post… oops.. yes… its your post ๐Ÿ˜†

    Me: Kanagu, I think you can try out the Sun-glasses look atleast. The rest, are irrelevant, I agree ๐Ÿ™‚

  12. Superbbbbbbbbbbbb one there ๐Ÿ˜€ Looks like I’ll agree with Pixie there, I’ll also prolly fall into the ‘behenji’ category, definitely not out of choice.

    Me: Join the club, Urmi ๐Ÿ™‚

    I can never wear sunglasses, I always look blind ๐Ÿ˜› and since I’ve never worn glasses ever; they always hurt the bridge of my nose ๐Ÿ™‚ The others were also real nice tips…loved it abt the earrings n the bag. I have tried but can never let my hair loose..cos it is frizzy and miserably curly ๐Ÿ˜‰ phew.

    Me: Urmi, try out the sun glasses, and see what a difference it makes. Promise!!

  13. Whatever else I may not have among items to make me look haep and khewwwl, I do have hair falling on my face being constantly pushed off and come to think of it I do look like a poodle when the wind is done with my hair! ๐Ÿ˜‰ ๐Ÿ˜›

    Me: ๐Ÿ™‚ You do have that crowning glory, Shail ๐Ÿ™‚

  14. You should seriously think of a career change and become a stylist :D. Thanks for the expert tips, Pal. The accent is of utmost importance too one suspects. Not just a fake English accent but we gotta speak even the good old mother tongue in English, too ๐Ÿ˜€

    1. Oh thank you, Dreamer! That is one of the best compliments I’ve ever received. Considering my ‘certified behenji status’, that indeed made my day ๐Ÿ˜‰
      Glad you brought in the ‘accent’ aspect! Khewl! ๐Ÿ˜‰

  15. Okie I get everything. What? I seriously do. *cross my heart and hope to die or something to that effect*

    ๐Ÿ™„

    But the oversized handbag is beyond me!
    The darn thing looks like it will swallow me whole. Plus looks like I am carrying my whole family in there.
    I am invisible behind it.

    And it looks hideous!

    Enough reasons? ๐Ÿ˜€

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