Growing up a female in India

Original post by Roop Rai (
“What would you say your experience was growing up in a society where fathers rarely enter the kitchen? Did it impact you to make you emulate what your mothers did or did you outrightly reject it or have you paved a path of your own?”

My response:
Someone asked: When we have a Women’s day, Mother’s day, etc. , why not an International Men’s day ? Well, we already are. “Every single day of the year”! Indian men are possibly, the most pampered species on this planet. And I completely agree with someone who said, women are women’s worst enemy.

I have had quite a cultural shock over the last few years, where I have seen “women waiting upon men”.

I had an experience, when I drank coffee before my husband did, and while he didn’t mind in the least, atleast 2 women in the house reminded me four times in five minutes about getting his tea ready!

The older generation still influence the present. What with all those mothers who think their “Abhishek Bachan” sons have erred by marrying an “average girl” ?! And what with the mothers who train their daughters to be doormats ? Unfortunately, while the women do not mind their husbands giving a hand with the household chores, they certainly cannot see their sons helping their wives. This is by far, the typical Indian family. We are plain lucky, if our families are different !!

I agree that men must be pampered, as they do bear the responsibility of heading the family. However, women need to be appreciated just the same, as they are in-charge of “internal affairs”. And I have seen this happening in most nuclear families.

And my final theory is “Gender equality will come about because of inflation”. 😉

Men and women will both need to work to support a home, and therefore, women will become more confident to want more out of life. And the men will either support it, or atleast not suppress the women.


6 thoughts on “Growing up a female in India

  1. Indian women would totally agree to your article…

    In today’s world when both men and women work…why is it assumed that the lady takes on the additional burden of work at home as well ?

    …And for the handful of men who do a tiny bit of work at home : It high time they realized that they are doing their ‘part’ and not ‘helping’ their wives !

  2. Just the other day, I was watching some kind of debate on the indian channel. It was bachelors against spinsters on what they expect from their future life partners. One guy was like…”I need my wife to do everything for me…I work all week…so she cant expect me to take her out everyweekend..I just want to stay home”….one of the girl’s respond to this was “All u need is your work done…a servant can do all that..why do u even want to marry?”…I think she was absolutely right!

  3. Like the lady mentioned in the TV show by Saras above, I do feel what Indian men and their families are looking for are basically glorified servants and that too with a handsome dowry. I will blame the parents of girls, who work hard, amass wealth and then go all out to look for a boy and his family to accept and spend all that money and treat their daughter as a glorified servant. And if she is ill-treated, they advise her to accept it as Fate!!!!! Why can’t parents make their daughters self sufficient instead?!!
    Women are the worst enemies of women. Period. They not only ill treat DILs but also don’t teach their sons to respect women. Men have a role of course to grow out of their mother’s anchal and think for themselves. But then very few people (man or woman) grow out of the shadow of parents. Sadly all this is still the reality in India.
    BTW there IS a Men’s day and it was a day back!!

  4. Absolutely Shail. No point blaming the men, when we women dig our own, and each other’s grave!

    LOL about Men’s day. Wish I’d known though, would have loved to pamper a Few Good Men 😉

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